


The Things That Don't Come

by okemmelie



Category: The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals - Team StarKid
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Post-Apotheosis (The Guy Who Didn't Like Musicals), THEY FLIRTED is what i'm trying to say, also spoilers: emma lives but we don't talk about that yet, anyway this is an emma saves ted's life and dooms herself post-apotheosis au!, i just want people who do look at the tags to know because sdfjsd i miss her, it's mostly about the hurt/comfort tbh, previous paul/emma but like they also don't get to kiss in this one, previous ted/charlotte, will update tags as i go probably
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-24
Updated: 2020-04-15
Packaged: 2021-03-01 01:47:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,844
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23297257
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/okemmelie/pseuds/okemmelie
Summary: One moment, the world is fine. It's not good, but it's fine because everything is exactly like it's always been. Then a meteor hits and life changes forever. For some, it ends. For Paul and Ted, it keeps going. It just doesn't keep going the way they're used to.
Relationships: Paul Matthews/Ted
Comments: 128
Kudos: 85





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> this goes out to an anon on tumblr who said "If your still taking prompts, I’d love to see your take on post-apotheosis Chai Coffee (infected or not)" because that's exactly what this is! do i know exactly how long this'll be? no. but i do intend to keep going until we're at a point where it feels done.
> 
> also me trying to brush over canon real quick did not turn out Well, so the first chapter and like half of the second one is just canon but with ted's thoughts over it (he has a lot of thoughts ok)

Ted loses everything. He knows it’s his own fault, knows that if he’d just said something different, done something different, she’d still be here. She’d still be alive. But now he’s crawling across the room to get away from her dead body and holy fuck, he’s really gone and fucked everything up for real this time. No take backs, no chance to makeup, nothing. He’s lost her. He’s lost her. He’s lost her.

For a moment, it’s like the world disappears around him. But then Bill starts talking, to his daughter, about his daughter. “Dang it! I need to take the car. She’s in Hatchetfield High. She’s locked herself in the choir room,” he tells them.

“And you’re gonna save her?” Ted finally takes his eyes off of Charlotte’s dead body. Bill might hate him and he might not like Bill, but he’s not losing someone else. “GI Bill? You’re gonna run and gun your way through a city of singing zombie motherfuckers? Wake up, Bill. She’s already dead.”

Bill walks towards him and there’s anger in his voice. “Don’t you dare, Ted!”

Maybe he could be kinder, but he has a feeling that kindness won’t be getting them anywhere. Kindness won’t keep Bill alive. But maybe realizing that it’s too late to save her will. “You’re going to get there and she’s gonna be dead and you’re gonna die too and that’s exactly what’s gonna happen if you try to go through downtown.”

“Well, what else am I supposed to do?”

“Don’t go through downtown,” Paul cuts into their conversation. He has a lot of ideas and yeah, perhaps they’d be good if he wasn’t setting Bill up for death anyway. God, if these people would actually listen to him, they wouldn’t be in this situation. If they’d just listened to him and left Sam in the alley, Charlotte would still be alive and Ted wouldn’t even have to worry about if Bill survived or not.

And sure, Paul’s little spurt of heroism is cute. It’s admirable. He wishes he could be like that, but he’s seen what happens when you keep hoping for something to work out even though the odds are against you and apparently what you get is a dead girlfriend (who never really was his girlfriend to begin with, but neither Sam nor Charlotte aren’t alive to correct him so who fucking cares).

But then the professor joins in. They start talking to Bill as if him getting his daughter back is a reality. It’s not. And they should know better. His eyes wander to Charlotte’s body again and fuck, it hurts. He takes another sip of the bourbon. Even Emily (Erica?) joins in and then Bill starts fucking talking again.

Ted can’t shut up. He can’t just let Bill talk and live in a false sense of security, because he  _ knows  _ that the world doesn’t pan out the way you want it to. He knows there’s no such thing as mercy and he can’t let these people install Bill with a false sense of hope. “Don’t bother, he’s gonna get lost.”

Erica (Esther? God, what the fuck was her name?) looks at him. “You are such a fucking creep, you know that?”

“Oh, I’m a fucking creep?”

She nods. “Yeah.”

“I’m a fucking creep?” Sure, she might not know how much he’s lost tonight, she might not understand his situation. She clearly doesn’t understand that he’s just trying to stop them from getting carried away with their heroic thoughts and their wishful thinking. “Listen, sweetheart, the world has changed, alright? There are no creeps. There are no heroes. There are only people who are alive.” He gestures to himself, to her, to his friends and to the professor. Then he yells while reluctantly acknowledging that Charlotte belongs in this other category. “And people who are fucking dead!”

He lets the silence fill the room for a moment, lets them take it in. They’re educated people (and a barista, but she’s gotta be in her thirties at least, so he assumes she’s had some experiences in life). They must understand the importance of the situation. It’s not about being a hero, it’s not about doing what’s right. It’s about survival and about doing what’s necessary to live on.

Then he keeps going. “And Bill’s daughter? She’s dead.”

Bill turns around, walks away from him. No one else says anything. The professor’s glace falls to the floor, but both Paul and the barista still look at him. At least there’s some sort of acknowledgement in Paul’s eyes.

“What? I’m only saying what we all know is true!” Maybe it’s stupid, but the acknowledgement in Paul’s eyes is something. It’s the only thing even remotely close to logic Ted’s seen for a good while and he’s desperate. He’s desperate for someone to extend a hand out and to be on his side. He’s desperate for Paul to understand the importance of the situation, for Paul to acknowledge that he’s right. “Right, Paul?”

And Paul does seem to be on his side. “Bill. If you go, you’re not gonna make it,” he says and it’s nice. God, it’s nice to be recognized. It’s nice to know that despite feeling so alone, at least he still has Paul. “Which is why I’m gonna go with you to get your daughter back.”

Fuck.

Right now is not the time to play a hero and he wants to tell Paul that, but he sees the determination in his eyes and he knows it’s too late.

And so he drinks. He lets Paul and Bill charge head first into certain death and he lets the barista and the professor work on whatever. None of them invites him along and maybe it’s because he’s just been an asshole, but someone needed to step up. Someone needed to at least try to help them survive.

He doesn’t think he’s ever felt more alone than he does now, sitting on the floor and drinking by himself while staring at his dead girlfriend. At least he has the alcohol to keep him company.

It’s sad, maybe even pathetic, but he barely even notices the professor sneaking up on him before it’s too late and there’s a needle in neck.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> listen i swear we're gonna leave canon in this chapter....... kind of

It’s a bit scary, being tied to a chair and facing certain death, but at least Ted’s able to accept that that’s where he’s heading. The professor killed Charlotte (Ted refuses to acknowledge that that’s not quite true, because saying that  _ he himself _ killed Charlotte is not something he is ready or willing to face).

At least he comes to terms with it pretty fast. At least he’s able to somewhat enjoy the last few moments of his life. At least he’s going out to a banger.

The funny thing about being ready for dying is that no one ever is, no matter how much they tell themselves they are.

At least that’s what Ted tells himself when someone who’s definitely not Greg and someone who’s definitely not Stu shows up (or maybe they are, he honestly has no clue). The thought of death goes from being something he’s accepted to being straight up terrifying as soon as those  _ things  _ show up and all Ted wants is to get out of there. He’ll do anything.

“It’s okay guy, I’m here,” Paul announces as he begins to free Ted from the chair (before he saves the barista they barely know and thank God for that, he didn’t know what he would have done if it’d been the other way around).

Wait. Paul. Paul? “Paul!” Ted’s never been more happy to see this coworker. He could hug him, but he doesn’t. Instead, he picks up the professor’s piano thing and uses it to help barricade the door on their way out, hopefully buying them just a little more time. He considers if now’s a bad time to suggest leaving Esther behind. She seemed keen on being a hero earlier and they don’t really know her: She can take one for the time, right?

Paul fills them in on what’s happened and on what’s going to happen, and Ted’s never really found him attractive and yeah, the whole being-the-hero thing was annoying and unsexy the last time he saw him, but now? Now things are different. Now Paul’s heroism has saved  _ his _ life.

And maybe he should let him continue talking, but despite his better judgement, Ted cuts in. “Wait, Paul, I gotta say something!”

“Not now, Ted!”

“Yes, now!” He’s out of breath and he realizes that maybe it’s a bad time and that maybe Paul is right, but the outside world feels so unsafe and he feels so stressed and overwhelmed by everything that’s been happening. He needs Paul to know that he appreciates what he’s done, that he appreciates  _ him _ , and there’s no other time than right now to let it be known. “Today, uh… Today has broken me. I’m ashamed of how I acted earlier, with Bill. Well, shit, I wanted to abandon Erica back there.”

“Emma!”

“Gesundheit.” He almost wishes he cared, but this is about Paul and his bravery. Her fucking name doesn’t matter in the grand scheme of things. “And Paul. I wish I could be brave, like you.”

The bari–  _ Emma _ cuts him off. “Shut the fuck up, dude, we gotta go!”

But he doesn’t shut up. He keeps going, he gets them to scoot closer so he can hold onto them while he talks. He tells them about how he’s been a grade-A asshole and he holds their hands. Today has taught him something and it’s important for him to get that across to them, since he wasn’t able to communicate it to Charlotte. “And it’s the people you care about, you know?” He pushes Emma off to the side, because if he’s being real, he doesn’t even care enough about her to pretend that he does. “Hey Paul? I have always considered you one of my best frien–”

He’s cut off. Not by Emma this time, but by one of those... things. It grabs onto Paul and everything in Ted tells him to make a run for it. He can probably save himself and get away while they eat Paul or whatever the fuck those fucking things are doing. And that’s his plan.

But before he’s able to, Emma grabs the gun out of his hand and shoots the thing. Then they all make a run for it. They just gotta get to that chopper and they’ll be safe.

Unfortunately, the military seems to have been infected which fucking sucks because Ted was willing to pretty much sell his soul for them just to take him away from here. He doesn’t want to deal with more shit. It’s kind of surreal being reminded of politics while fighting for his life, but he supposes it’s better than being beaten up by his dead girlfriend.

They make it to the chopper. Paul puts on a seatbelt and tells him and Emma to do the same. Emma doesn’t listen, so Ted fucking makes her. He might not like her, but he’s not losing her to something as stupid as a seatbelt. He refuses.

And thank God he does, because who knows what would have happened to her if not? The chopper falls and they don’t make it off the island, but at least they’re all kind of okay. That’s a start.

It takes them a moment to get collected, to get their shit together and to devise a plan, because they had so much hope in the chopper and it’s hard to see it all ripped away from under them. It’s Ted who eventually pushes on. “We need to get off this fucking island.”

Paul nods. Emma looks between them, then shakes her head. “The meteor. We gotta destroy the meteor.” Ted opens his mouth to begin to protest, but Emma just turns her entire attention to Paul. “It’s like your friend said, you know, the hive mind?”

“Which friend, Bill? Ted? Charlotte?” Paul tries.

Emma isn’t having it. “I don’t know your friends’ fucking names!”

“I’m literally right here.” They both ignore him.

Then Emma continues. “You take the head off, the whole thing goes down.”

So she’s taking  _ his  _ idea and not even bothering to credit him? He’s not surprised, but he doesn’t have time to really be annoyed with it. They make a plan and Ted’s happy with it, because it has Emma going to destroy the meteor and it has both him and Paul escaping to Clivesdale, hopefully unharmed. Emma tells some sob story about how she has no one anymore and that it’s not the biggest sacrifice if she doesn’t make it and, like, good for her or whatever, but they really don’t have the time.

She picks up a grenade from the chopper before she leaves, but she stops herself to have a final moment with Paul. It’s a real eye roller, because they talk about coffee and she admits to probably having spit in it (which, gross!). “Anyway, Paul. If we get through this, I would love to just see a nice,  _ silent  _ movie with you, but in case we don’t… Kiss me?”

“Jesus Christ, Emma! Fucking leave already!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inevitable doesn't happen which is good for them but sad because it's a good song

Thanks to Ted’s connections and skill set (he hooked up with the president of the Hatchetfield boating society in one of their boat storage rooms once and he remembers where the key is), they make it off the island. They make it to Clivesdale and on the shore, a small squad in similar attire to the military unit who’re now dead in Hatchetfield (PEIP, as Paul calls them) awaits them.

They’re told to follow. Seeing as they have no better things to do nor any other objectives in life outside of survival right now, both of them just nod and do as they’re told. They’re led to a hospital and they’re asked questions; about who they are, about how they’re alive and about what happened on the island.

Aside from a few scratches, both Ted and Paul are fine so it doesn’t take long before a general or whatever the fuck she is walks into their shared room in the hospital and informs them of the things that’ve happened in Hatchetfield; an explotion took down the meteor and stopped the spread temporarily. In part thanks to this and in part thanks to Paul and Ted’s quick arrival (and especially Paul’s information about what had happened to their unit in town), PEIP was able to make a clean sweep of the island from the air.

She hands each of them an envelope. “Inside you’ll find a new passport and social security number. We’re still looking into housing. Would you two prefer to stay together or should we split you up?”

“Together.” Ted doesn’t even give Paul the chance to answer. “We’d like to stick together, please.”

“Very well.” She nods at them, then starts walking out.

Paul stops her. “Wait, general Schaffer. Um, this is a lot to take in, is there a chance we could be allowed outside? Just to catch some fresh air.”

“That’s a negative, Ben.” She offers him a sympathetic smile though and that’s something in these times, right? Ted decides that it’s something because so little means anything anymore. “But you can open your windows. Perhaps you’ll find it helps.”

She leaves the room and the two of them goes to open a window together. For a while, they just stand there together in silence, overlooking the few streets of Clivesdale that’s visible from their room. It feels strange to look at a world that’s peaceful, a world that hasn’t dealt with loss and tragedy, a world that isn’t filled with people like Paul and Ted who’ve lived through what happened in Hatchetfield just yesterday.

Part of him is happy they can’t see the island from their window. He doesn’t know what kind of feelings that would bring up in him, but he does know that he doesn’t really want to find out. Instead of thinking about it, he leans his head against Paul’s shoulder in a desperate attempt to feel some sort of human contact. Paul, ever the hero, wraps his arm around Ted’s shoulder and for a long while, that’s it. They just stand there, holding onto each other while hoping the world won’t suddenly change again.

“Ben Bridges,” the general hands Paul yet another envelope. “You’re doing statistical analysis on part time for a small company near San Francisco. And you, Alek Atkins.” Now she hands Ted something as well. “You’re in luck. You’ll be the social media manager for a theater in the heart of the city.”

Social media manager? Not exactly in his skill set, but not too far off either. He’s sure he’ll manage.

“Your background and your history with each other is detailed in these documents. We suggest you get to know them and fast. A taxi will arrive in front of the hospital in twenty minutes and take you to the airport. Once you land in California, a Mr. Kinsley will be there to escort you to your new apartment. Take care.” She nods. Once at Ted, once at Paul. Then she leaves the room.

None of them have much to pack, seeing as all of their belongings have most likely been destroyed in the Hatchetfield catastrophe (and even if they haven’t, there’s no way they’re going back to the island and collecting them), so the twenty minutes they have to prepare feels like forever.

They eventually get into the taxi and then into the plane. It’s finally here Ted takes his time to read through his documents (Paul was smart enough to do it in the taxi and he kept telling Ted to do it, but he wasn’t feeling it and now he is). He gets why Paul wanted him to read it though, because it’s…  _ something _ .

Alek Atkins isn’t just the new social media manager of a (most likely shitty) theater company. He’s also the long-term boyfriend of Ben Bridges.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> paul's not doing too good, but at least he has ted (who might be sad but who at least knows how to ""solve"" problems)

Their apartment is already furnished when they get there and it surprises Ted more than he thought it would. Mr. Kinsley shows them around the apartment: It’s modern, it’s chic and it's perfect for a young  _ fashionable _ couple like them. He says goodbye, then shakes both of their hands before he leaves.

And yeah, their apartment might be modern and chic, it might be perfect for a young fashionable couple like Alek and Ben. But there’s no one but Ted and Paul here and it feels empty, it feels lonely, it feels off.

If Ted’s being completely honest with himself, he doesn’t know what to do with himself. So instead of standing around in the entrance with Paul (who really is just standing around; he’s not doing anything to communicate or showing signs of wanting to, he’s just staring intensely at the door), he goes for a little tour around their apartment.

Sure, he’s just been shown around by Mr. Kinsley, but being shown around and experiencing things on your own is a completely different experience in Ted’s opinion. It certainly feels like it today and he’ll take that, because feeling anything and having opinions is something he’s desperately willing to cling to, even if it’s just about his experience with fucking apartment decor.

The apartment doesn’t feel like  _ him. _ And sure, maybe that’s a good thing, maybe no one’s supposed to live in a piece of shit apartment like the one Ted has –  _ had _ – back in Hatchetfield, but he lived there so long and it felt like home. His shitty fridge might have been way too small and barely functional, but at least it was  _ his  _ and that was something. That meant something.

Come to think of it, it never once felt like it meant something before just now.

Ted’s life in Hatchetfield was honestly kind of shitty. Yeah, he had family, but that’s not something he’s anywhere ready to think about so he doesn’t. He had a shitty job at a shitty office, he barely mingled with his coworkers and by the time he got around to trying to form connections with them, it was already too fucking late (and honestly, he didn’t even do that good of a job, he just yelled at them and watcthed them die or walk to their deaths). He had an affair with a woman who’d never loved him back, who he’d given so much of his time and his mental resources in a hope that maybe one day she’d come around and even with her husband dead and actively trying to kill them, kill her, she’d still not picked him.

No, Ted had always been pathetic and his life kind of attested to that. He probably wouldn’t even have been alive if it wasn’t for the fucking barista.  _ She  _ probably would have been alive if it wasn’t for him.

Maybe her and Paul could have made something of themselves. Maybe they could have kissed, maybe they could have gotten together and found some light despite the circumstances.

It probably isn’t what Ted  _ should  _ be thinking about, but he’s never been good at loneliness, he’s never been good at not being paid attention to.

He peeks his head back out to the entrance and Paul’s still just looking at the fucking door. That’s not something he can work with, so fuck it, he thinks to himself as he searches his pockets for the envelope with money in it. None of them are working for the next four days. He’s getting booze.

Red wine, white wine, bourbon, tequila, vodka, lemon and salt. Ted doesn’t plan on leaving the apartment again until he has to go pretend to be happy and in a committed relationship; be Alek. Right now he gets to be Ted and Ted wants to get very fucking drunk and forget all his thoughts and forget he’s feeling empty, so he’s gonna make Paul drink with him (or at the very least pretend to drink with him, but he’s really hoping Paul will actually join on the drinks because that seems more bearable).

Paul’s still in the entrance when Ted returns, but he’s moved from standing up and staring at the door to sitting down and staring into a wall while rapidly tapping his finger against the floor.

For a moment, Ted considers abandoning his plan and just getting drunk on his own. Paul clearly has stuff going on and he honestly has no idea how to interrupt him, because yikes! But then on his way to put the white wine in the way too new, way too big looking fridge, he decides two things. One, he doesn’t care about how Paul feels at all and he could use a drinking buddy to take his mind off of things. Two, he kind of cares about how Paul’s feeling, and seeing him sitting on the floor like this or staring at the door as he had previously done is kind of starting to worry him, so he’s more than willing to force him to join in.

“Hey, doofus!” Ted puts two glasses down on the floor next to Paul, then gently nudges his shoulder before joining him on the floor. “Drink up.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyway have i told y'all that i love paul matthews :'))

Paul prefers white wine, but Ted tells him it’s unacceptable to drink it before it has a chance to cool down so he shoots down a glass of whiskey instead. They still haven’t moved from the floor in the entrance, but it’s okay because they’re both adults and can do whatever the fuck they want. Besides, it doesn’t look like there’s any plans for them to move at all, for Paul reaches out for the whiskey again and pours himself another glass.

It goes down just as quickly as the first one, but at least Paul actually  _ speaks  _ to him once he’s recovered. Ted appreciates that. “We’re… in California.”

Ted nods a few times. It’s not the kind of conversation he was hoping for, but maybe he’s the fool for even hoping anything actually making sense would be coming from Paul at this point. “We sure as hell are.”

And just as fast as things went from horrible to alright, they go back to horrible. Because Paul doesn’t answer him (not that Ted said anything of value, but hey! He’d appreciate an answer) and then that just kind of becomes it. Ted downs a shot of whiskey, then he puts all the alcohol in the kitchen and decides that maybe giving it time instead of alcohol is the better plan.

When he’s ready to go into the bedroom (there’s only one bedroom and it has a double bed and Ted doesn’t get why they have to share in their own home where probably no one will ever visit, but whatever! He’ll manage), he notices that Paul’s still on the floor and he decides that he can’t just leave him there.

“Come on,” he whispers in a soft voice, as he goes to help Paul off the floor. Paul sighs, but lets Ted help him up. “Let’s get you to bed, alright?”

Paul nods and the two of them make their way into the bedroom. Now, Ted often thinks of himself as pathetic and yeah, maybe he is, but seeing Paul going straight to bed without even taking his fucking shoes off is a whole other level than what he’s used to. He gets it. Things are really fucking hard right now and he knows he sure as hell haven’t processed them yet, but if there’s one thing he knows how to do, it’s comforting people who are in worse situations than himself.

“Paul, I know you just want to go to sleep, but I’m going to need you to sit back up,” Ted insists. With a huff and a sigh, Paul reluctantly sits back up and faces Ted, who offers him an unusually soft smile in return for doing as he told him to. “Thank you.”

Knowing that Paul almost definitely is in a worse spot than him right now makes it easier for Ted to power through. First, he unties Paul’s shoes and helps them off. He just throws them under the bed, because he honestly cannot be bothered to do much more right now. It’s better. It’s something. Then he sits next to Paul on the bed and asks him to turn to face him. Luckily, Paul listens again. It makes it easier for Ted to help unbutton his shirt. Paul doesn’t make an effort to take it off himself, so Ted sighs softly before also doing that.

Ted then presses a few soft kisses to Paul’s shoulder. There’s nothing in it, no feeling at least, but he does know it usually helps calm Charlotte down when she’s having a rough time and Paul is undoubtedly having a rough time. “I’m not going to take your pants off for you, but I will suggest you do take them off. Gonna be a whole lot more comfortable to sleep if you do.”

For a while, Paul doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t do anything either, just looks into Ted’s eyes. And Ted looks back with a raised eyebrow and a hand firmly planted on Paul’s shoulder, which he gives a tiny squeeze. “Alright, fine.”

“Good.” Ted ruffles Paul’s hair, then gets off the bed to go get undressed himself. He politely looks away when Paul actually gets undressed. Not that he cares, not that it matters, but he figures that Paul doesn’t need any more things to think about right now.

Paul’s already under the covers when Ted crawls into bed. He’s all the way on the opposite end of the bed and that’s fine, because it means more space for Ted. There’s a part of him who wants to move closer. It feels strange sharing a bed and not cuddling, but today doesn’t seem like the day to push his luck. Maybe tomorrow.

There’s a lightswitch above the bed and Paul uses it to turn the light off. Ted wants to go to sleep, he really does, but closing his eyes sucks because all he’s able to think about is Charlotte. And Bill. And hell, even the professor and fucking Emma. Emma, who they haven’t heard from. Emma, who blew up the meteor. Emma, who most likely died saving their lives.

“Hey Paul?”

He hears some movement from Paul’s side of the bed and looking over, he can vaguely see Paul’s body turning to face him. “Yeah?”

Ted realizes that telling Paul he just wanted to know if he was awake is lame, so he doesn’t say that. He also doesn’t ask Paul to hold his hand even though he thinks that could be exactly what he needs right now (or maybe not exactly, but it could be a start). A lot of the things he wants to say are pretty stupid and insignificant, he realizes as he quickly thinks all of them through.

He ends on something simple. “Sleep well.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this ! is ! not ! how ! you ! deal ! with ! your ! issues ! boys !

Maybe it shouldn’t be surprising, but the next day isn’t much better. Ted wakes up and there’s nothing compelling him to get out of bed, nothing to get him going. It’s incredibly frustrating, because he  _ wants  _ to keep going but he kind of feels like he’s Paul and the date is yesterday. Is that his over-complicated way of saying he feels like he’s running into a wall? Yes. It is. Sue him.

It doesn’t take him too long to realize that Paul isn’t in bed. At first he’s surprised, but it very quickly turns into pride. Or maybe not exactly pride. He’s impressed, is what he is.

So he gets out of bed and he gets dressed and he walks around in their new apartment desperately hoping to find him somewhere.

And he does.

Paul is sitting in the living room, which Ted considers a victory. It’s certainly better than the entrance, even if he’s still sitting on the floor. At least he’s sitting on the floor in front of their window.

Not knowing what else to do, Ted decides to sit down next to him without saying a word. He doesn’t have anything to say and besides, the view is pretty good so he’s entertained enough to keep himself going even without conversation.

It almost surprises him when Paul whispers something to him without looking in his direction. “You know… I woke up thinking that maybe this was some weird dream, that maybe none of this was happening. My brain was so willing to believe that we had just gotten drunk and slept together in a hotel room and that everything that happened back in Hatchetfield was just some weird dream.”

Ted nods. He certainly wouldn’t have put something like that past himself. He wants to say something nice or at least something reassuring. He gently elbows Paul in the side. “Well, hotstuff, if you want to sleep with me so badly, all you have to do is ask.”

Okay, so maybe it’s not exactly nice, maybe it’s not reassuring, but at least it brings the weakest shadow of a smile on Paul’s lips, so it’s worth it. It also earns him a little shove. “How are you holding up?” Paul asks.

It’s a good question. He doesn’t have a good answer, so he just shrugs. “Honestly? I’m trying not to think of it.” How he’s doing is none of his own business. He has–  _ had _ family, family that he loved and cared about, back in Hatchetfield and he knows Paul did too. Ted’s never been one to deal with his emotions, so he’s fine bottling up for now. He’s used to it. “How about you?”

Paul chuckles. A smile that doesn’t exactly read  _ happy  _ forms on his lips and he nods a few times. “Yeah.”

And then that’s it. Paul doesn’t elaborate and Ted doesn’t ask him to, because he gets it. It’s really fucking difficult and since when has talking about anything been a good coping mechanism? No thank you.

Their remaining time in the apartment before any of them starts working is just an endless cycle of things that don’t come. They wake up in the mornings and desperately try to adjust to the fact that they’re not getting ready for work, that they don’t have the same jobs, that they won’t get greeted by a smiling Melissa by the door.

Bill doesn’t ask Paul to go out for drinks with him even though it’s a Friday night and Alice isn’t with him. Bill doesn’t ask Ted if he wants to go out for drinks with him even though it’s a Friday night, but that’s somehow more normal, because Paul doesn’t even get a chance to turn Bill down.

Then it becomes Saturday and Charlotte doesn’t text Ted to ask if he wants to come over (there’s no poker night for Sam anymore because there is no Sam anymore).

It’s almost suffocating how little goes down.

Saturday night, they finally get around to opening the tequila. Ted almost got around to thinking that maybe it was a bad purchase, but Paul swoops in last minute (not that there really is a last minute for them or their fucking tequila, but whatever) and suggests shots.

That’s something Ted can get behind.

A lot of their time these past couple of days have been spent on the floor in front of the big window, so that’s where the two of them settle down to enjoy a nice evening of tequila, lemon and salt (because there’s no way Ted’s not going all in on this; he’s paid for all these things so they’re doing it properly).

About five shots in, Ted decides to take a break and rest his head against Paul’s shoulder. It doesn’t exactly work out for him, because Paul very quickly ends up wrapping his arm around Ted and so Ted ends up leaning more against his chest than his shoulder, but he comes to the conclusion that that’s certainly better than nothing.

He’s missed this. Not necessarily with Paul (he and Paul have never done anything like this before), but just in general. There’s not many things in this world more comforting than physical contact and even if it’s new and kind of strange, it’s still comforting. It’s still better.

Then Ted makes a mistake. He looks up at Paul only to find him looking down at him. That’s not his mistake. His mistake is inching closer. His mistake is leaning in for a kiss.

Paul’s mistake is closing the distance between them.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi friends!!! i am in the middle of moving and it's taking up a lot of my time and energy, so expect slower updates for the next while!!!

The world is filled with strange curiosities that Ted does not understand or expect. Like singing zombies from outer space, like secret military organizations in charge of cleaning up after messes not unlike the one Ted (and Paul) lived through in Hatchetfield just shy of a week ago and whatever the fuck else PEIP have dealt with is probably pretty fucking incomprihensible and certainly not something a guy like Ted could expect.

However, the world is also filled with much smaller and much more comprehensible things that Ted also does not understand or expect. One of these things being Paul. Not Paul in general, Ted’s pretty sure he understands or at least expects Paul. See, the thing is, he never expected to wake up naked in a double bed with a definitely also naked Paul’s body draped across his.

However, Ted is smart and he’s honestly great at handling situations like these. He’d take a talk of shame over singing zombies any fucking day.

He unwraps himself from Paul very carefully, making damn sure not to disturb Paul too much, then just as carefully crawls out of bed. He tip toes across the floor and–

“Wh– What the fuck? Ted?”

_ Dammit _ . “Good morning, Paul!” Ted swears silently, then turns around to face Paul with a smile. Is it a fake one? Perhaps, but that’s neither here nor there. He’s gonna play it cool and he’s going to pretend like last night didn’t happen. “Hope you’ve slept well. I feel like shit, so I’m gonna go get some water.” He considers letting that be it. “You need anything?”

Paul takes too long answering. He probably takes a normal amount of time, but that doesn’t matter because it feels like far too long to Ted, who’s just kind of standing there, waiting. “Uh, yeah. I– Water would be great, yeah. Thank you.”

With a nod, Ted is out of their bedroom (because wow, okay, it really is their bedroom, where the fuck would he have walk of shamed to?). He heads straight for the kitchen, because yeah, sure, he could get dressed, but considering that Paul and him have already fucking slept together and that they’re going to be sharing this apartment for God knows how long, he’s decided that it doesn’t matter.

A short while later, he returns to their bedroom with two glasses of water. He rejoins Paul in bed because fuck, he’s hungover and he doesn’t want to be anywhere that’s not a fucking bed. Does he spill a little bit of water on himself as he does? Irrelevant (but the answer is yes nevertheless).

“So we, uh...” Paul trails off before he’s even really gotten started.

When he after a while hasn’t picked up again, Ted sighs and decides to attempt to finish his sentence. “Fucked?”

It makes Paul blush. “Yeah…” It’s more a mumble than anything else, but Ted will take it. Having slept with Charlotte for the better part of two years, Ted is more used to instant denial than to any sort of recognition. Plus, knowing he has the power to make Paul blush is honestly kind of refreshing (and exciting).

They share a moment of silence. It’s mostly spent finishing their water and putting their glasses back on their respective bedside tables, but Ted also spends the time trying to think up a plan as to what he should do next. The plan he ends up coming up with is not a good one, but it’s a plan so he goes with it anyway. “So, hey, I know we just woke up and whatever, but I really don’t feel like getting out of bed. I do, however, feel like cuddling, but that’s a two player game. You in?”

The fact that Paul continues to look mildly baffled doesn’t really surprise him. The fact that he nods, however, does. “But you gotta put on some pants.”

“Really, Paul? Pants? That’s your biggest concern? Fucking pants?”

“Look, do you want to cuddle or no?”

Ted sighs, but gets up to do as Paul says. Only sweatpants, though. Fuck cuddling in anything more than sweatpants.

Now, Ted might be a cuddler, but that doesn’t mean that he expects what happens (and honestly, who allowed Paul fucking Matthews to do the unexpected?). With Charlotte, he was always the big spoon except for the few times where they’d forget spooning altogether and she'd just plop down right on top of him. Paul, however, pulls him in close to his chest and for the first time in at least two years, Ted finds himself being the little spoon.

It’s… surprisingly nice. He probably should have expected it, but he feels oddly safe in Paul’s arms. Maybe it’s because he went and played a hero when they were still in Hatchetfield, maybe it’s because they’ve had only each other after everything that went down, maybe it’s something completely different.

It doesn’t matter why he feels safe, he decides. It just matters that he does. He wiggles a little closer to Paul and closes his eyes, a faint smile resting on his lips as he tries to go back to sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i <3 paul

Mr. Kinsley arrives early Monday morning to pick the two of them up for work. Paul’s office is much closer than Ted’s, so they drop him off first. It’s not before the car stops in front of the building Ted realizes how terrifying it is to suddenly start their actual new lives.

“Good luck in there, Mr. Bridges,” Mr. Kinsley says. “Read this when you get the chance. It has instructions on how you get back home, so I’d recommend finding a chance before the workday’s over.” He hands Paul another envelope and Paul gives him a little nod as he accepts it.

Then Paul turns to face Ted. “I’ll, uh… I’ll see you tonight?”

Ted nods. For once in his life, he feels at a loss for words, so he doesn’t say anything. He does, however, smile when Paul pulls him in for a slightly awkward hug before he gets out of the car. He watches Paul – well, Ben – walk towards the office building as Mr. Kinsley starts the car back up.

The rest of the car ride is spent in complete silence. Not even the radio is running. It’s not something Ted’s noticed before just now, but he supposes he’s always had Paul to distract him. Doesn’t stop it from being fucking weird. Who likes being alone with their thoughts? It’s stupid.

“Mr. Atkins.” Mr. Kinsley’s voice startles him a bit, but hey, at least it manages to get his attention. “I doubt you’ll find time to read this on the job, so use the rest of the ride wisely.”

An envelope similar to the one Paul was handed is handed to him, but it takes Ted a moment to connect that Atkins, Alek Atkins, is him and that Mr. Kinsley is asking  _ him  _ to do something and not just some other guy in the car that they’ve picked up without Ted noticing. But Alek Atkins  _ is  _ him, so he grabs the envelope and mumbles a vague, non-committed response. Then he opens the envelope.

It’s real boring stuff and Ted thinks it’s stupid that he’s being forced to read this. He’s going through a personal crisis, he’s lost a lot – if not almost everything – and PEIP expects him to process information on how to be a capable social media manager and how to get home from San Francisco? Assholes, the bunch of them.

At least they’re paying for him to talk to a therapist (a therapist from PEIP, sure, but a therapist nonetheless). He’s never been a big fan of talking about his life or his feelings, but he’s also never seen all his lovers, friends and family be turned into singing zombies so he’s willing to give it a shot.

He texts Paul, letting him know he’ll be home late and then he goes through his first day at work as Alek Atkins, the social media manager.

After what feels like a very long day of both getting used to a new job, a new persona and name, and PEIP-sonsered therapy, Ted’s excited to get home. He feels strangely excited to see Paul again, which he believes to be fair. No one else in the world has gone through quite what they have, after all.

Luckily, Paul’s around when he gets back. His shoes are neatly placed in the corner at the entrance and his jacket is hung up, plus Ted can hear noises coming from the kitchen and he seriously doubts someone else would have broken into their apartment with Paul’s things, only to hang around in their kitchen. Ted kicks his shoes off and leaves them by the door. He takes his jacket off as he heads to the kitchen and throws it over the back of a chair.

“Welcome back.” Paul greets him with a smile. He’s mid-cooking (and thank God; they’ve been eating takeout since moving in and it’s getting kind of late anyway, so food is exactly what Ted dreams of) and he’s still in his work clothes.

Ted considers telling Paul he’s missed him, but he quickly realizes he doesn’t really want to admit to it. He goes for a different approach. “Missed me?”

It makes Paul roll his eyes, but at least there’s a small smile on his lips. Ted takes that as a victory. Then Paul asks him to help with dinner and since Ted doesn’t really have anything else to do, he does so without complaining.

They end up eating dinner on the couch and Paul tells him all about his day. It’s not the most interesting thing in the world (it’s just a fucking office job with boring office people who aren’t their previous boring office “friends”), but he appreciates being told anyway even if it makes him think of Bill and Melissa and even Mr. Davidson (Paul’s new boss seems much more normal, but to be fair, he’s only worked there one day; things could still change).

Then Ted tells Paul about his day. He complains that he’s doing something so different when Paul gets to do something so similar (but he’s honestly happier about it than he thought he’d be, because relieving anything from Hatchetfield seems stressful and thank fuck he doesn’t have to).

He has more things to complain about. “And Alek Atkins? What kind of fucking name is that? Who picked these? If someone came up to me and told me their name was Alek Atkins, I’d immediately suspect them of being in witness protection. How do they expect me to grow used to my new name when it’s so fucking stupid?”

“I… don’t know?” Paul shrugs. “Maybe we should start practicing it in the apartment? Just so it feels more normal, you know?”

Ted raises an eyebrow and gives Paul a good look, hoping that he’ll tell him that he’s joking. But he doesn’t. So Ted shakes his head and rolls his eyes. “That’s a horrible idea. I hope you know that, Paul.”

After loading the dishwasher together, they go sit in front of their window together once again. Had they been in Hatchetfield (where they knew almost everyone) and not San Francisco (where they knew no one but Mr. Kinsley (who they barely even knew anyway)), maybe they’d been playing softball right now. Sure, none of them had been part of the company softball league because none of them wanted to be, but maybe they would have joined if they had the chance to go back and that had to count for something.

Instead, all they had was their fucking window. And perhaps each other, so maybe it wasn’t too bad, all things considered.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> paul……. <3

The next few months of their existence passes and it passes slowly. Ted’s still trying to get the hang of the whole living thing, because it doesn’t feel like that’s what he’s doing. At least not at work. It feels so pointless to be working when the world is filled with mysteries and aliens and things he can’t comprehend, but he tries.

At least he has Paul. That’s the one positive in this whole thing.

Paul’s always home earlier than him and he always starts making food for them and he always tells Ted it’s his job to load the dishwasher, but he always ends up helping anyway because Ted’s kind of slow (allegedly, at least) and they fall into conversations over dinner that they never quite finish, so Paul might as well help out, he says.

It’s nice. It’s really nice, actually. Ted’s never really had someone to co-exist with quite like this and he’s never really thought of himself as someone who’d enjoy being domesticated. And yeah, maybe once he’s over this whole  _ ‘almost everyone I know is dead’ _ -business, he’ll be missing sleeping around, he’ll be missing partying, he’ll be missing not being tied up to someone, but right now? Right now he’s quite content, maybe even happy, with what he’s got (even if all he’s got is Paul, who he doesn’t really have, but whatever).

In an attempt to show Paul just how happy he is to be sharing this strange time with him, Ted takes a day off of work (his boss doesn’t really mind, because Ted (well, Alek – it’s confusing to navigate, but he probably has to come to terms with the fact that he’s Alek at work sooner rather than later) says he’ll come in and work on Saturday and that’s just fine).

He spends almost the entire day shopping and decorating the apartment. Then he tries to cook something for them, something nice and something good and something he knows Paul would like, but he kind of fucks it up so he ends up ordering them pizza instead and settles on that being good enough. He showers, he puts on something nice and then he paces around their apartment, kind of mad at himself for taking the entire day off because that means he’ll have to wait for Paul to come home and honestly? That’s kind of the worst thing ever.

Why is he so nervous about this?

He decides he doesn’t like confronting the realities of the answer the that question (feelings are scary and sure, he might be dealing with his feelings about what transpired that fateful day in Hatchetfield, but he refuses to grow up and acknowledge romantic feelings before they’re actively punching him in the face – and he can make his own decisions on that), so he just decides that it’s because he’s trying to get into character. He’s Alek, boyfriend of Ben, and he’s just doing something nice because that’s what boyfriends do (which, by the way, how cruel is it that they’re pretending to be boyfriends publicly when Ted’s busy repressing his totally not real feelings?).

At least Ted’s a resourceful guy who knows how to put his restlessness to good use. He cleans the entire apartment and then he redecorates, because the living room wasn’t looking as nice as he wanted it to. He hopes Paul will appreciate how clean everything is. He also hopes Paul will appreciate the small set up he’s got going on.

It’s not a lot, really, Just some blankets and pillows on the ground in front of their window (also honestly, how has it taken them so long to get pillows and blankets down here?), some candles and of course, a bottle of nice white wine (it’s still in the fridge, but he’ll get it down there once Paul’s almost home) and two glasses. No one needs to know about the rose petals, because Ted’s thrown them out (they were a bit excessive anyway and he’s pretty sure Paul wouldn’t even like them (if he had gotten them of course (he totally didn’t buy roses, shut the fuck up))).

When it’s almost time for Paul to arrive, Ted gets the white wine and puts it on the floor. Then he starts pacing the entrance, once again regretting his choices because why wouldn’t he? Maybe he should just pack it all up and pretend like this didn’t happen. He could go throw it out and wait at a cafe until he was supposed to get home and– but wait, that doesn’t work, because then he’ll have to explain to Paul why he has to come in for work and Saturday and he really doesn’t have a good excuse ready to go and  _ ugh _ .

There’s a sound. It’s not the front door, however, but rather it’s his phone buzzing. Strange. He goes to check it and sees a text message. From Mr. Kinsley. And it’s asking him to come meet in his home immediately.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can recycle a little canon dialogue. as a treat

There’s a lot of things Ted doesn’t want to do and leaving their apartment to go deal with whatever bullshit it is Mr. Kinsley has in store with them is on the very top of that fucking list. He just put in so much fucking work, he took the day off of work and there’s literally no way he’s doing something like this for Paul again if he fails now.

So he does the first thing that comes to mind and calls up Paul, who picks up the phone surprisingly fast. “Hi, this is Ben Bridges talking, how can I help you?”

Ted’s caught off guard by the name, so he lets a moment pass before he answers, just to process. “Why are you using your work voice?” Paul gives him some explanation about being outside their apartment and their rules being like that, but Ted doesn’t fully listen. “Yeah, yeah. Did you get a message from Mr. Kinsley?”

“Yeah, I did. I figured I’d just stop by at home before going, seeing as I’m almost there. What do you think it’s about?”

Despite being fully aware Paul can’t see him, Ted shrugs. “No fucking clue. Anyway, I was thinking: What if we just don’t go? What if we pretend we haven’t seen the messages and stay at home instead?”

“Sure.”

Ted stumbles over his own words, because he was ready with a sales pitch and a number of good excuses for them to stay at home. He had not expected Paul to be so easily convinced. “Wait, really?”

“Yeah. It’s been a long day at work. Staying home sounds a lot nicer. And if he can’t specify why it’s important we get there, it must not be important enough.”

“I’ll be honest with you, I didn’t expect it to be this easy.”

Paul laughs over the phone. It’s a quiet, kind of awkward laughter, but most of Paul’s laughs are kind of awkward so Ted can’t really fault him for that. “When are you going to be home?”

“Uhhh…” Ted hangs up. He doesn’t have a good answer that doesn’t spoil the surprise, so hanging up feels more right.

Then he goes back to circling the entrance until he hears footsteps from the other side of the door. Until he hears the keys going into the door. Until he hears it open.

Until he sees Paul.

Paul does look like he’s had a rough day at work. Well, for a moment he does at least. Then he spots Ted and instead, he just looks confused. “Ted.”

“Paul.”

“You’re home.”

And Paul is right about that, so Ted just nods. “Sure am.” Now Paul’s nodding too. He’s not really saying anything, so Ted figures it’s his job to try figuring something out. He suddenly wishes he’d planned this far. “Wanna come with me to the living room?”

Paul nods again, this time more involved than before. “Yeah… Yeah, sure. Okay.”

Part of Ted wants to take Paul’s hand and drag him to the living room, but he has to remind himself that they’re not in love, that they’re not even involved and that taking Paul’s hand would probably be strange, so he just leads the way as casually as his body will let him.

The set up earns him a soft smile from Paul and it makes his knees weak, and okay. That’s strange. Maybe he likes Paul a little more than he planned, than he wants to. And maybe that’s fine, because he’s smiling at him like this. He’s still not going to confront him about it, but he does manage to return the smile.

They sit down, Ted pours them a glass of wine while Paul opens a pizza box. They drink, they eat, they talk and they have a good time. Paul finds a stray rose petal and holds it up to Ted with a raised eyebrow. Not really knowing what to do about it. Ted gives Paul’s shoulder a little shove, which earns him a little laugh.

And maybe it’s not too bad because before he knows it, Paul’s leaning in and it feels eerily similar to the last time they kissed, the first time they kissed. Ted closes his eyes and he leans in and–

The doorbell rings.

Ted swears under his breath and watches as Paul’s cheeks turn rosy. Paul’s the first one of them to get off the floor, but he extends his hand out to Ted and helps him up, which Ted appreciates. Then they go to open the door together.

“Ben. Alek.” It’s Mr. Kinsley. “I would like you to meet my niece. Kelly.”

And out from behind him steps none other than Emma Perkins, who immediately goes to pull Paul in for a hug. Mr. Kinsley follows her into the apartment and closes the door behind him.

“Oh my god, Emma!” Paul exclaims as he closes his arms around her. “You made it! We made it!”


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ted's a bit dumb, but i love him a lot ok

It’s a bit awkward, just standing there and watching Paul and Emma hug. Like, good for them and all; yay, they’re reunited, their love story is coming full circle and they can finally get that fucking fated kiss they’ve been promised. But like, do they have to do it in Paul and his entrance when he’s right there? And when Mr. Kinsley is right there? Ted thinks that’d be awfully rude, even for Paul. Maybe not for Emma, but at least for Paul.

They don’t kiss. It’s surprising to him, but he supposes it’s fine. They do, however, hug for a really long time and it gets annoying enough for Ted and Mr. Kinsley to share an eyeroll about it before he claps his hands together in an attempt to catch their attention. “Let’s go to the living room, yes?”

Something happens. That something is Ted, very quickly shaking his head. “No, no, no, no.” He doesn’t want Emma to see the living room. That’s too much and he refuses to deal with that. “Let’s go to the kitchen.”

And luckily, they listen to him and follow him to the kitchen. It’s comfortable enough. Sure, there’s no couch or whatever, but it’s fine. There’s seats and they take them. Mr. Kinsley sits at the end of the table, Emma takes a seat next to Paul who holds her hand over the table and Ted? Well, Ted sits on the other side of the table, all by his lonesome.

Maybe it makes sense like this, he thinks to himself as Mr. Kinsley starts explaining to them what happened to Emma. First the real story. Then the fake story. Then he starts calling her Kelly. Maybe Ted let things get in his head too much, maybe he just imagined that there was a real connection between him and Paul because they were alone in this together with all this fucking stuff to deal with for a month.

No. Not maybe. He definitely did.

Emma’s looking at him. She’s smiling, she’s smiling too much and he doesn’t like it, but he keeps looking because well, if nothing else, he is an expert at getting too close to the flame. He is an expert at getting burnt and not stepping away.

Then comes the punchline. The big joke that the world is playing on Ted and he hates it, so he doesn’t say a word when Mr. Kinsley tells Paul that Emma will be moving to Colorado. She’s gonna start a pot farm. And she’d like Paul to come with her, which PEIP have decided is fine. They can make it work.

Paul opens his mouth. To answer, Ted pressumes, but no words come out. So he closes it again. He looks nervous, well, more nervous than he normally does. It’s impressive really. He looks to Mr. Kinsley. To Emma. Back to Mr. Kinsley. Back to Emma. Then he looks at Ted.

“I…” Now he’s talking. Yeah, it’s one word and it doesn’t sound very committed, but Paul’s talking and that’s a start. It means Ted can wallow alone in his self-pity sooner rather than later and that’s good. Paul looks at Emma once again. “I’m so happy you’re alive. And I’m happy to see you again; very happy, in fact. But… I’m happy here.” Ted catches Paul throwing a glance in his direction as he says that.  _ Happy. _ “Or well, happy might be a lot, but I like it here. And I’d like to stay. Sorry.”

“Oh.” Emma looks more than a bit hurt, but the expression only stays for a moment. “Okay. Okay.” She nods to herself a few times. Bites her lip. Then she gets up. “Well, I just wanted to say hi. Hi. George, can we leave?”

Mr. Kinsley (George, apparently?) nods at her and before they know it, Emma’s already out of the apartment. George (like, seriously, who allowed him to have a regular first name that didn’t start with K when the rest of them has to suffer like this?) smiles apologetically at both of them, before he pulls an envelope out of his pocket and leaves it at the kitchen table. “She’ll come around, don’t worry. We’ll be in touch,” he tells them. Then he leaves with Emma.

When the door closes, the apartment fills with silence.

For a very long time, that’s all there is. Neither Paul nor Ted says anything, they don’t even look at each other. Or well, maybe Paul looks at him, but Ted doesn’t dare to look back if that’s the case. He just stares at the envelope and silently suffers. And when he gets bored with that, he goes to open the envelope, still without saying a word but at least the silence is broken by  _ something. _

“It’s an outline of our friendship with Kelly Kinsley. We’ve known her since college,” Ted says when he finishes reading. He doesn’t feel like telling Paul the rest, so he just pushes the letter across the table to him. “Her phone number’s on here as well.”

Paul picks it up. He doesn’t say anything, so Ted assumes he’s reading. And sure enough, the letter is put down on the table after a while and Paul takes a deep breath. He expects Paul to tell him that he’s leaving with Emma anyway. That this whole staying behind thing is just temporary or even worse, a joke. Because sure, Ted’s life is more unstable than it’s ever been (not that it’s ever been anything but unstable, but whatever!), but one thing is always constant. One thing always comes. People always leave him. And that’s just the way things are, the way they’ve always been. It’d be stupid of him to expect anything else.

Without saying anything, Paul pushes out his chair. He circles the table and stops in front of Ted, which finally brings him to look up at him. There’s a soft smile on his lips that Ted doesn’t quite understand and he’s holding out his hand.

“What?” Ted asks, perhaps in a tone that’s a bit too aggressive for the situation, but whatever.

“Come with me,” Paul says. His tone isn’t aggressive; no, it’s nearly as soft as his smile. He puts his hand into Ted’s and Ted has no choice but to follow (well, he has a choice and his choice is to follow, but it’s not like he actually has a choice, because Paul makes him want to go with him anywhere, blindly, and that’s not really a choice).

They end up in front of their stupid fucking window, because of course they do. They always end up in front of their window. But the pillows and blankets are still there, so it’s more comfortable. And Paul is there. He supposes that’s comfortable as well.

Eventually, Emma calls them. Well, Kelly (she hates the name PEIP’s given her, so Ted makes it his mission to use it as much as possible). She apologizes for acting the way she did and asks if they can meet up before she leaves San Francisco. They say yes.

Eventually, Paul kisses Ted. None of them are drunk and it’s not anything special, just a short, sweet kiss before Ted leaves to go to work in the morning. None of them talk about it, but eventually it becomes a habit. Paul kisses Ted goodbye in the morning and Ted kisses Paul good afternoon when he gets home.

Eventually, they actually talk about their feelings. Ted initiates the conversation and Paul struggles to put words to the things he feels. And yeah, perhaps they fail and hook up in the middle of the conversation, but eventually Paul wakes Ted up in the middle of the night and tries to put what he’s feeling into words again. And yeah, he fails again, but Ted doesn’t mind because it’s the thought that counts.

Eventually, happy stops being a lot and starts being what they are. Happy. Ted’s never thought he’d be happy and certainly not with Paul. Paul tells him he’s never been happy, tells him he’s never thought he’d be happy either. But all things considered? He’s happy in his office job, he’s happy in their apartment, he’s happy. With Ted.

But all those things are yet to come. For now, they’re just Paul and Ted, looking out their window and drinking an uncooled bottle of white wine Paul found in their cabinet. They’re just Paul and Ted, slightly leaning against each other and not saying a word. They’re just Paul and Ted, and if Ted knew what the future had in store for them, perhaps he’d stop being a coward and kiss Paul right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sdlfjsd ???? thank you so much for reading this far. shout out to stef for being like a good 93% of the reason these two ended up getting a happy ending (or well…… future? i guess. idk!) follow me @helenmcwife on tumblr dot com


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